Holidays always make me realise myself.

at skl how would most people describe me, quiet, hard-working, sensible.(there are about four exceptions to this)
at home how would most people describe me, lazy, loud, immature,

sometime this really frustrates me, i always feel like people at skl don't actually know the real me (again about four exceptions) this is because i always feel shy to say what i really feel or what i really want to. i think its also different people bring out different sides to your personality.

At home i can mess around and not worry about being judged. conversations are also entirely different because at home there is a wider variety of converstaion, music, sport, skl, family, tv and it goes on, at skl i kind of feel like the only topic conversation is skl, or the latest party and who did the stupidest thing. about three exceptions to that one.

this problem has occured time and time again wen it comes to 16th party, at home it will all be sorted easy, dance lots, eat lots, have fun lots, theres no need to get drunk to have lots of fun. whereas with skl friends its slightly more complicated, im not having a house party because frankly i don't want lots of drunk people messing around in mi house. plus its not very big. so i am confused, i guess thats ages away so i can worry later.

but seriously, at home its fun to have serious heated discussions about football with the likes of ricky, rajan, sunny, etc cause they get into it! that doesn't happen at skl, it would just be akward. im not saying it should its just an example of how things are different.

im sure for everyone things are different at home and skl but sometimes it just gets me how things can be so different. i think that the fact that at home most of the people i hang out with are indian or have a lot of indian friends so we have more in common that way, but then some people at skl i have tonnes in common with, some peoples for example, rosie i have hardly anything in common with but shes like one of mi best friends, things are strange.

anyway i was just thinking about how its odd because i could be perfectly happy not seeing anyone from skl during the holidays and just hanging around at home with other people. but then i would deffo miss certain people so i make an effort to see them.
it will be interesting to see who i keep in touch with wen i leave.. i am already 100% sure about 3 people and there're and two of them are probably not the people most would expect.. again strange.

anywayz off to do chemistry and then find out whats happening bout the match tonite, whereever we're watching it they better have tortillas, have a craving for some reason!

xxx